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Self-confidence is quality that needs to be developed and nurtured over a period of time. Learn how to increase your self confidence.

“Have confidence in confidence” — stick to this mantra and you’ll be unstoppable. Confidence is something that needs to be worked upon. Even the most confident people can stumble sometimes and lose their self-confidence as a result of unpleasant experiences. 

Developing confidence in oneself is very important because it increases the chances of succeeding in something. If the opposite happens, self-confidence is a quality that can bolster your confidence further and motivate you to keep going even in the face of failure. The most important factor to help you grow your self-confidence is to try new things. Remember, you won’t know until you have tried. Also, don’t let the fear of failure come in the way of reaching for your goals. Failure only teaches us valuable lessons and it should be a reason to come back stronger. When we stick to this mindset, we are self-confident and invite more self-confidence as we go further.

If you are struggling with self-confidence issues, the following are 6 ways that will help you develop this very important quality in yourself:

1. Try the unknown

To let go of the fear of the unknown, it is important to face it head-on. People who are low in self-confidence tend to think negatively about themselves and doubt their abilities to get things done. It is very important to get out of your comfort zones to grow as individuals. There are many ways to gain self-confidence by doing something you normally wouldn’t be confident of doing. For example, going out to dinner by yourself or watching a movie alone in a movie theatre, giving interviews just to gain confidence, going to an art exhibition, and discussing the artworks with the artist even if you don’t have a clue about art, etc. It is important to keep challenging yourself to gain self-confidence.

2. Work on your appearance

If this sounds frivolous to you, please take it seriously. A nice pair of heels or a crisp new shirt can do wonders for your self-confidence. When we look good our brain produces feelings of satisfaction and happiness. This is an instant boost to our self-confidence. So, invest in clothes and shoes that fit well, get a nice haircut, a little makeup also won’t hurt. Also, taking good care of your skin, getting a massage at the spa, hair treatments, etc. will make you feel good and take pride in yourself.

3. Get active

Along with dressing smart, you can bolster your self-confidence by getting into shape. We don’t want you to be superficial but to work on yourself and this includes taking good care of your health. When we take care of ourselves, our bodies, appearance, etc. we make a good impression on others and instill confidence in them about ourselves. Not to mention, this will also attract many compliments your way and instantly boost your self-confidence.

4. Avoid comparisons

Comparison is the thief of joy and also confidence. When we constantly deride our own achievements and what we have because we perceive what others have is far better, we are being extremely unfair to ourselves. In an age dominated by social media, comparisons are difficult to control. We are constantly bombarded with filtered and edited images of even the silliest things like a brunch or a new pair of sunglasses to more lavish images of vacations abroad. When every minute of someone’s life is glamorous and shown off, it is natural to feel inadequate in some way. However, this can damage your self-confidence over time. 

The best way to deal with this is to first cut down on social media time. Instead, spend time improving yourself and doing things that you like doing. Second, understand that what we see on social media is not the entirety of one’s life. The very people posting these glamorous and fake images of their lives also have problems; in some cases, they are even worse than what we imagine. Third, stop comparing yourself with others. Each one has a different and unique lived experience, choices, decisions, etc. that make our life what it is. Every person is different, every life journey is unique. So, stop comparing and capitalize on your abilities, achievements; take pride in yourself and your life. When this happens, your self-confidence will soar high.

5. Fight your impostor syndrome

We have heard about our mind having two voices, the positive one and the negative one. According to the New York Times, “the Impostor syndrome is a nasty mental bug that convinces you that your accomplishments don’t really count. The Impostor Syndrome forces our minds to think about and relive failures rather than successes thus casting doubt over our self-confidence. Therefore, one must make a habit of reminding oneself by writing down or simply remembering one’s successes and achievements. They may not be awards and accolades but something you are proud of. For example, giving an inspiring speech on a public forum or losing 10 pounds before your high school reunion. When we reflect on our successes, we immediately boost our confidence levels.

6. Allow yourself to fail

Be open to failures and at the same time be kind to yourself. Allow yourself the space to fail. Remember that every failure is an experience with a learning curve. Don’t beat yourself over it but learn from it. When you make this a consistent habit, self-confidence to do just about anything will follow. At the end of the day, what doesn’t kill us only makes us stronger. So, don’t be afraid of failures. In fact, look forward to them because you will only bounce back stronger with higher self-confidence.


Self-confidence is quality and tool that needs to be developed and nurtured over a period of time. Even the most self-confident people have times when they have their confidence shaken but that doesn’t mean they give up. Confidence can be gained by having the right attitude, self-belief, and pride in oneself. Working on ourselves, pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones every now and then, enhancing our appearance, having a healthy body image, and constantly celebrating our successes will motivate us and inspire self-confidence. When we celebrate our uniqueness and individuality, self-confidence will follow.

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